Had the following conversation with the twins today, I have had similar ones MANY times before.
Twins: Dad, Watcha doin?
Me: I'm not sure, what do you think I am doing?
Twins: Making a cake!!!!
Me: If you knew that why did you ask?
Twins: (Shrug) I dunno.
Do children really get joy out of asking questions they already know the answer to? Is it a cry for attention? Are they really that dumb? Did their mom drink too much Black Cherry IBC when she was pregnant? Do they simply have no other way to start a conversation? I doubt that last, my kids can have a conversation with a doorknob, telling it about their day in detail, and then lecturing it about what they are going to do next. I often find that I am forced to tell my kids to stop planning my life for me in their constant stream of verbal thought. I almost wonder if they cannot think without doing it aloud.
Have you ever noticed it is possible to go into a fast food restaurant, order a meal for each child and none for yourself and still come out having had a reasonable meal? It is amazing what the call of the play structure can do to the appetite of the average child. Of course the quality of the playstructure and the number of children playing on it at any given time can also be factors. If it is dirty and there are a zillion kids on it, you ain't gettin no leftovers, I can tell ya that!
Have you also noticed that the more emphatically you ask your kids to do something, the slower they are to do it? If you regress to the stage of crying in the corner sucking your thumb because you can't get any co-operation you can actually see your kids moving backwards in time, seriously, NOTHING will be happening, or even worse they will be doing whatever the (Bleep) they want to, and this because they know it will keep you in that corner, fetal position locked in forever. How much does it cost to send your kid to one of those British boarding schools, grey buildings, grey clothes, grey food and out of your hair? I'm not talking Hogwarts here.
How did I end up here? Why did you let me get off track like that? Humph! Some blog reader you are, can't keep me on topic at all. Sad that. Now what was I going to say originally?????????